December 14, 2013

Penultimate day of Xeloda round 12

Yesterday was the second-to-last day of round 12 of Xeloda and it hit me hard. By mid-morning I had diarrhea, followed by fatigue, hand-foot issues, and mouth sores. I decided to cancel the neighborhood Shabbat dinner we'd planned to host for some folks from our synagogue because I could barely hobble, much less shop and cook. Everyone understood and sent me wishes to feel better soon. I slept the rest of the day. Rik ordered some Chines food and I crawled into bed around 8 PM.

The hard thing about all of this was that I'd forgotten how awful the chemo side effects can be, since I don't experience very much on Xeloda. Yes, I have a lot of hand-foot syndrome, but for some reason it wasn't so bad this month. I didn't even have to use henna! But I keep forgetting from month to month what the last two days of each cycle and the first two days of the time off can be like. Xeloda is cumulative, so I feel much worse at the end of the cycle than at the beginning.

So today is the last day. My feet hurt so much when I got out of bed to use the bathroom that I couldn't bear to stand. Rik brought me some yogurt and my morning meds but I stayed in bed until 1 PM. Hunger finally drove me up and by then my feet were less tender, the diarrhea had stopped and I really couldn't sleep any longer.

This is how it goes: I feel rotten, I blog about how rough it is. Then I feel better, I live my life, and I forget to blog except for special things, like holiday celebrations.

I guess I need to put my blogging on a schedule so that I don't go too many days on "quiet mode."


  1. Feeling too good to blog. I love that excuse. I pray you get a chance to use it often.

  2. It's good you mostly feel well. And HFS is awful, I am almost halfway my second cycle but had ten cycles of Xeloda two years ago. And yes, it's cumulative as you rightly say.

    Hope you keep on feeling well and may the HFS disappear in your break.

  3. It's nice for us to imagine that when you are not blogging, it's because you are doing well! I haven't done Xeloda yet and am fearful of HFS if I ever do. Sounds awful.