June 11, 2010

A new cancer dream

Last night (or probably very early this morning) I dreamt that I was somewhere with people I knew. But they didn't resemble themselves and they were chasing me. One was spreading all sorts of nasty rumors about me. Another was trying to drown me. I fought back with a broom, screaming and shouting for them to stop. And I didn't drown but clung to a railing and pulled myself out of the water.

After I woke up it became clear that this was another cancer dream. The unrecognizable people were my metastases, and they were trying to kill me. My broom weapon was the Abraxane. And pulling myself out of water too deep for me? That represented my body's ability to heal itself.

I've had these cancer dreams before. I think this one means that I am worried the cancer will get the upper hand, but that I feel strong enough to fight it back into submission. In this household, I am the alpha dog!

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