Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day 2011

Today, October 13, is Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day. I received this email from Living Beyond Breast Cancer this morning. You can help raise money specifically for metastatic breast cancer.

For Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day 2011, Genentech has partnered with Living Beyond Breast Cancer, MetaVivor and Metastatic Breast Cancer Network to help support people living with MBC — this time with a focus on how friends and family can help.

  Today, they are launching a new video that provides a look at how the disease is different from early breast cancer. The video reflects the sentiments of an online survey of 760 people with MBC and provides us with simple ideas on how friends and family can help these women with their journey. For every video view, Genentech will donate $1 to MBC initiatives and programs (up to $20,000).

Please help us “spread the word” in these three easy steps:

1.   Facebook:       

a.   Replace your profile picture today with the Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day image on your right.      b.   Post a “status update” about “Faces of MBC” that links directly to the video:
            Example: Today is Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day. For each view of Faces of MBC video, $1 will be donated to MBC initiatives (up to $20K). Watch today – www.facesofmbc.org.

2.   Twitter:    

       a.   Follow @facesofmbc and re-tweet messages about #FacesofMBC      

Example: New video gives a voice to people with metastatic #breastcancer. Check out www.facesofmbc.org to spread awareness and raise $1.   

E-mail: Send a link to the video – www.facesofmbc.org to your friends and family via e-mail

Quick update

Monday's chemo went even slower than usual. I arrived at 11 AM but the lab was backed up, so they didn't take me until 11:30 AM. I waited more than 90 minutes for lab results and a go ahead from Dr G to treat me. Thanks to my good friends G and R I had company almost the whole time, but still! 4+ hours for a 90 minute infusion? I just can't get over it and yet it happens time after time.

I was so drained by the time I arrived home at about 5 PM that I got into bed and stayed there until this morning. (Rik ordered himself a pizza and looked after Bob the dog.)

Our sukkah - note the grape lights

I felt much better when I got up but was tired after the morning dog walk and a few errands. I waited at home for the delivery of the new Blomberg washer and dryer. The installation finished by 4 PM and I have been catching up on email, doing some cooking for the Sukkot holiday beginning tonight. We're having chicken with prunes, capers and olives plus quinoa. Tomorrow's menu will feature pear-squash soup. I'm lucky that I can eat well while on chemo.

Happy Sukkot to one and all!

Trying something new

Blogger has created new Dynamic templates. What do you think of this version, called Magazine? It's a different way to showcase my blog. Just click on a post to read the whole thing. I'd like your feedback.

May her memory be for a blessing

We drove to Vancouver BC today for the funeral of Rik's "aunt." The two families were so close when they all lived in Montreal. The kids called all the parents aunt and uncle and they refer to one another to this day as cousins.

Auntie E was devoted to her family. She found tremendous opportunity for self-expression in  caring for her husband, children and grandchildren. She died suddenly last week while visiting her daughter's family and due to the impending Yom Kippur holiday, the funeral was delayed until today. Normally Jews bury our dead within 24 or 48 hours, a custom which doubtless harkens back to our ancient desert days.

Rik's cousin, the rabbi who married us, gave a moving eulogy about his mother. His voice cracked with emotion as he reminisced about the close connections between the two families. The burial immediately followed the funeral service, and as is the custom, everyone present helped. We throw shovels full of dirt into the grave, using the back of the shovel at first to show our reluctance. It's the last act we can do for another human being, which they can never repay. The thump of dirt on the coffin is the most final sound you can imagine and truly brings home a sense of loss.

We then formed two columns and the mourners walked between them to the cemetery's exit as we offered the traditional words: May God comfort you among all the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem. Last we washed our hands, symbolically purifying ourselves.

After the funeral and burial we returned to Uncle S's home for the meal of consolation. We Jews also believe that it's important to show immediately that life does continue for the mourners. We ate round foods: hard-boiled eggs, lentils and chickpeas, which symbolize the circle of life. As we talked with one another about Auntie E, I noted that G had torn the kriah on his tie. I learned the Montreal custom is for men to tear their neckties and for women to tear a scarf which they wear around their necks.

Rik and I stayed as long as we could, then drove home to Seattle. On the drive he told me more stories about their growing up together. The whole day was a chance for me to become even closer to Rik and his family.

Zichrona l'vracha - may her memory be for a blessing to all who knew her.


(If you want more information about Jewish mourning customs, I find that this site is particularly informative.)

Onion cookies

Last night my sister called with the annual reminder that it's time to bake the onion cookies. This family recipe was handed from my grandmother Mary Neuer Cohen to my father, and from him to my sister and I. It's our special way to break the fast after Yom Kippur. You can find the recipe here. I baked a half-batch because we only have 12 people coming over to break the fast, and a full batch yields 40+ cookies.

There is nothing quite like an onion cookie fresh from the oven and slathered with butter or cream cheese. Think of it as a savory Jewish biscuit, complete with chopped onions, black pepper and poppy seeds.

(I almost forgot to add the onions; they were on a cutting board on the other side of the sink and not in my direct line of sight. I had to put all the cut cookies back into the bowl and knead the onions into the dough. Fortunately they still came out fine!)

I bake them a day ahead to serve after the fast. The cookies can get soft after a day in a baking tin, even with a piece of bread placed in the tin to take up the moisture form the onions. I have figured out how to improve upon the piece of bread in the tin. You heat the cookies briefly on a baking sheet in a low oven to restore crispness. Still delicious!


I also baked four loaves of crown challah to bring to the pre-fast meal this afternoon and a chocolate-zucchini cake for the break-the-fast tomorrow night. I'm on a baking roll! (Pardon the unintentional pun.)

Wishing all gmar hatima tova, a good conclusion to the days of awe. We should all be written and sealed in the book of life for the next year.

Missing them

I have spent the past few days practicing yizkor, the memorial service for Yom Kippur. Yesterday I had the bright idea to find the CD my friend T made of an old tape recording. My dearest friend from high school, Charisse Kranes, became a rabbi. Only a few months after her ordination, she was diagnosed with cervical cancer. She attributed the hard lump she felt in her belly, plus the various tummy aches and pains, to nerves as she approached ordination. Instead she had a tumor the size of a grapefruit.

After surgery and while she was undergoing chemo, Charisse got married. A year or so later, when she and her husband had moved to the Bay area, I asked her to record some high holiday music for me. This became the "love note," as she called it, which my friend T had transferred to CD for me a few years ago. Charisse died in 1989 at the age of 32.

Imagine my surprise when I didn't recognize Charisse's voice on the CD. Who was that talking and singing? Only after a few moments had passed did I realize that I was listening to Charisse, z"l. I spent the next while labeling all the digital tracks and uploading them to iTunes. I didn't find the particular tune I'd hoped she'd recorded, but that brief trip down memory lane made me realize how much I missed Charisse.

Preparing for yizkor also makes me think of my father, Sheldon Charles Cohen. He did in 2008 at almost 80 years old. How I wish that my husband had had the chance to know my dad when he was younger, less bitter and more happy. Dad survived a stroke at age 62 and spent his last few years with non-Hodgkins lymphoma. He gradually let go his hold on life. On my last visit, when I was deputized by my mother and sister to find out Dad's wishes regarding a funeral etc., he was still filled with hope. I had the hard talk with him, and he asked why I was crying. He said he wasn't planning to die. This, while he was practically immobile in a nursing home bed. Somehow, we never do want to let go of life, even when we are dying.

The death of Apple co-founder Steve Jobs is all over the news today. I heard a recording of him giving the 2005 commencement speech at Stanford University. Here is the part that struck me in the heart:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new.

So I practice my yizkor tunes, think of my departed family and friends, and hope that I will do justice to what they taught me this coming Yom Kippur. Zichrono l'vracha, may the memories of our loved ones be for a blessing to all who knew them.

Appliance rant - don't buy Whirlpool!

We own four Whirlpool appliances: a dishwasher, refrigerator, washer and dryer. The washer began having issues just after the warranty period ended. Recently more issues arose with this three year old washer. The white cycle stopped working. The normal cycle stopped working. And then it died on every cycle. Turns out the electronic circuit board has failed. Repairs were estimated at more than $400, almost the price of a new washer. So I thought I'd call Whirlpool and see if their customer service department is really service-oriented.

After waiting on hold for more than ten minutes, the customer services representative assured me there was nothing she could do since the washer is past the limited one year warranty period. I asked to speak with a manager, waited on hold for another ten minutes, and was told the same thing: the machine is no longer within the warranty period, so Whirlpool can't (read won't) help.

Moral of the story: NEVER BUY WHIRLPOOL AGAIN. And tell everyone you know not to buy Whirlpool products.

Pinkwashing

Check out this YouTube video about pinkwashing.

Take action at www.thinkbeforeyoupink.org.
Pinkwashing has reached a new low this year with "Promise Me," a perfume commissioned by the giant of the breast cancer movement, Susan G. Komen for the Cure. Promise Me contains chemicals not listed in the ingredients that: (a) are regulated as toxic and hazardous, (b) have not been adequately evaluated for human safety, and (c) have demonstrated negative health effects.

Think Before You Pink defines Pinkwasher: (pink’-wah-sher) noun. A company or organization that claims to care about breast cancer by promoting a pink ribbon product, but at the same time produces, manufactures and/or sells products that are linked to the disease.

So PLEASE don't buy the pink ribbon products. If you really want to support this cause and find a cure, make a donation to a charity that puts their money to good effect:

METAvivor (funding research exclusively into metastatic breast cancer)

The Breast Cancer Research Foundation (the name says it all)

A happy new year to all

Rosh Hashanah was terrific but it's been a long few days. We celebrated the beginning of the holiday at dinner Wednesday night with the usual gang of friends (family of the heart, I call it). On Thursday, after a long morning of praying, we had a long afternoon of eating and socializing with more friends, some family of the heart and others we have shared this holiday with for as long as I can remember.

The ancient Jewish custom of tashlich involves casting our sins into the water symbolically using a piece of bread. We always do this with friends at Alki Beach. This year I noticed a group of very Orthodox men in black suits, white shirts and hats. We moved a little further along the beach and read a few words from the prayerbook, sang a few songs with water themes, and did a little private meditation.

On Friday I went to synagogue while Rik taught school. After more praying, I enjoyed yet another large meal with synagogue friends and headed home to prepare for Shabbat dinner.

Do you detect a praying and eating theme here? I often tell a joke about what's behind so many Jewish holidays: They tried to kill us. God saved us. Let's eat.

Saturday was Shabbat Shuva, the Sabbath between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur commonly known as the Sabbath of Returning. There are some special additions to the prayer service on this day, and I've been leading a particular service for many years and did so again. Because the new year holiday fell on Thursday and Friday, there were fewer people than usual in synagogue by Saturday. Three days in a row is more than many (most?) Jews can handle.

By Saturday afternoon I was pooped beyond belief. I crashed hard on the sofa and slept for a few hours, ate a light meal of leftovers and watched a DVD.

This morning I felt enough better to make french toast from the remaining challah, go to the grocery store, and have a long visit with some close girlfriends. We went out for dinner (Greek avgolemono soup at The Continental Restaurant and Pastry Shop). Now I am in my jammies, ready to put my feet up.

I am pretty tired after all these new year's activities, but I am extraordinarily happy to have had the energy to celebrate as much as I did. I think this bodes well for the new year!

Rosh Hashanah wishes

We say something like this in my weekly yoga class:

May all beings be free from suffering.

May we all be healed in heart and mind.

May all beings live in peace and harmony.

May we have joy and happiness in abundance.

שנה טובה ומתוקה

Shana tova umetuka

Wishing you and yours a good and sweet new year